Tuesday, July 28, 2009

congratulations!!!!

last night....i call my baby d...aku xtahan dgn ape yg aku fikir....aku baca blog tu abis2...sedih nye aku xdpt share sume tu dgn die...sedihnye aku xdpt panggil die bulan...sedihnye....

tpi aku gembira sebab ade org leh share dgn die...aku happy sgt2...n org tu pun panggil my baby d bulan die....worth....that the important of sharing...me??? i don't i guess....baby d selalu ckp yg kitorg ckp mcm ayam ngan itik...so i can't read baby d...tpi aku bersyukur sbb ade org yg faham die....even what i said is a burden to me...aku rela semata-mata nak tgk baby d bahagia....

mungkin aku bodoh sbb cemburu buta...org dah explain pun tpi aku masih nak bangkitkan hal ni...aku xleh...aku check blog tu satu2...bnyk link dorg...dgn ex2 die pun ade...dgn chip tu pun ade...ntah la....lantak la...aku xnak ingat ape2 lepas ni....

aku bkn jahat tpi aku sedih sgt2...sejak aku bersemangat kembali ni la first time aku rasa sgt2 down....even tgh tulis ni pun aku leh nangis...aku benci keadaan ni....biarlah..jgn pedulikan aku....
aku boleh hidup walaupun aku lupa semuanya....asalkan hidup dan tidak menyerah...i can build my life back...i know i can walaupun sakit....

d~ i love u so much....klu ini harga yg terpaksa b bayar sbb pernah wat d merana dulu b redha....cuma b doa dgn Tuhan supaya kurangkan sikit beban yg b tanggung...b xnak nangis hari2 tiap masa...its not worth crying 4 u...u r juz an ordinary human being....the different is i love u....tu je....

congrats to me...senyum dalam sengsara....

no love no hug....i don't deserved it....

important????

juz a guess...what means important???

someone said that i'm a very important person in their life...but...it huz but...why they do such thing...sharing with someone else n not with me??? caring 4 someone else n not with me???? ifeel down...so sad....bkn aku x syg die....aku syg dia...tpi dia xpernah nak buat sume tu dgn aku...dulu mcm tu jgk....

sume ni punca dari blog...dulu, die share dgn ex die...skrg die wat dgn org lain lak...nape bkn dgn aku??? am i not an important person?? dia ckp i love u to me...but sharing the feeling with someone else....ape jgk tu??? aku xfaham ape2....mang la aku ckp aku ok...xde ape2...tpi realitinya...aku sgt2 terasa dgn ape yg die wat....mang la die ckp kawan...aku leh terima tpi ntah la...hati aku sakit...aku seperti xde makna dlm hidup dia....aku menangis sbb aku sgt xleh terima ape yg die wat ni....die ckp aku x percaya die...aku percaya die....aku percya die sgt2 tpi jgn la wat mcm ni....leh share dgn org lain....smpi bila aku nak tahan klu die asyik ckp ape yg die tulis kat blog tu tipu??? abis ape yg betul??? ape yg perlu aku percya?? aku sgt2 keliru...

xpernah aku balik dari gym dkat kul 1 pagi...umi abah marah sgt2...tpi aku xleh...sepanjang aku wat fitness kat gym tdi aku nangis...ntah la...mgkn aku cuba berlagak mcm xde ape2...tpi hakikatnya lain...hati aku tersentuh jgk....aku sgt sygkan dia....org lain tau die bulan..tpi aku?? bru tau tdi yg die tu bulan...ape maknenye ni???? die sentiasa nak wat aku keliru dgn identiti die...klu sygkan aku jgn wat mcm ni....bila dia wat mcm ni seolah-olah aku ni x berharga...hurm..biar lah...ape2 pun aku sgt2 berterima kasih padanya...sbb dia sudi menyayangi diri ini....

wat baby d....terima kasih sebab sudi syg b....u r the best...i tried to be strong but i couldn't....i'm a total disaster....but i won't give up....even i lost u...u r still the one i love....even i don't remember u tomorrow...juz know that i love u.....

-xoxo-

~baby b~

Monday, July 27, 2009

lie????

hurm...guess what??? aku kna tipu lagi....SHIT!!!!!!

aku percya die 100%...no doubt...but yet...still do the same thing...cheat behind my back....what a fuck!!!!!

lantak ko la manusia....malas aku nak ckp dah.....Allah je yg balas budi baik ko kat aku.....

geram tpi xguna nak marah2...dah tabiat manusia tu suka menipu...nak wat mcm mane...biar aku jdi malaikat ubah die tpi klu die xnak berubah nak wat mcm mana....terpulang....

Sunday, July 26, 2009

tada i ma....

tada i ma....means i'm back....back from what??? dunno...hahahahahahahaha....

today is a very long day for me....n i'm so tired too....pagi2 g training kat stadium..coach aku yg baik hati n hensem serta penyayang tu paksa aku training...dah la pagi tdi hujan renyai2...mau je x aku tertidur kat stadium tu...kwn2 ku punya la berang kat coach 'kesayangan' kitorg tu....dah la paksa org pas tu leh senyum simpul je....arrggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! geram!!!!!!!! kitorg training bagai nak gila smpi terlentang kepenatan kat stadium tu....hehehehe...tpi sekali-sekala paksa diri mcm ni best jgk...tau nape? aku dpt hilangkan tension, lupakan masalah aku n mcm2 lagi.....

pas je dri stadium aku bergegas lak g skola...adehh...aku kna bagi test kat bdk2 camping lak....test pertolongan cemas asas....dah lama aku xbagi test kat org...sib baik jgk sumenye berjalan lancar...n as usual cikgu aku masih lagi kagum dgn cara aku mengendalikan test yg susah tu....next week aku kna kuarkan markah dah....pening lak....balik je umah ade majlis keluarga...sambut birthday abah aku...penat jgn citer la..aku sempat rehat utk solat n mandi je....kul 6.30 ptg lak...aku cpt maghrib n berkejat ke gym...coach aku punya la baik hati tunggu aku bersiap...die tau aku nak skip kan...

kul 9 tdi bru balik dari gym...penat sungguh...tpi aku puas....actually...i miss someone so much....but i don't know why...juz don't know what happen...i'm confused maybe...dunno....arrgghh!!!! lantak la!!!! aku nak bahagia dgn hidup aku....

now...i'm happy with me...with who i am....yes i miss u...so much...damn much...but...there are something that i don't really know the reason....i love u....yes i love u...so much...my love never change for u...but yet...there are something that make me confused...it was u or me...i still don't know...trust...is all i have 4 u...n what have i left here is my heart...

i'm back n i want to be more positive....

-xoxo-peace....

Thursday, July 23, 2009

onto ni omedetto!!!

heheheehhe....tahniah abah!!!! ari ni hari jadi abah yg ke-? x tau la jgk...hehehehehehe....umi ckp mlm ni potong kek je..t ari sabtu bru wat majlis sambutan...hehehehehe...syg jgk mak aku tu kat bapak aku....

yg wat aku happy lagi...abah aku yg sibuk pasal graduation day aku....aku leh wat xkisah jer....hehehehehe....lucu jgk bile smlm die tnya bju aku 4 that day dah siap blum...die leh suruh siap aku g cri bju lagi...die yg bayar sume....adehh...semangat bapak aku ni...tpi ok la tu....xde la aku kelam kabut karang.....

smlm hari aku berjalan agak lancar....except 1 je...aku xleh text org coz aku xde cdit n hp aku lak wat hal....bile la aku nak dpt hp bru ni??? abah kata minggu ni...dah nak abis minggu dah ni....adehh....pening2....xpe sabar itu separuh dari iman....yg penting sabar insyaallah akan dpt....

esk aku kna wat preparation lak...4 our sport tournament....mental n physical kna ready....4 ari aku cuti...coach aku ckp gym tu sunyi jer....coach aku xtau aku g gym kwn die....hehehehehehe....klu die tau mampus aku kna marah.....sbnrnye, die rindu kat aku la tu....dah xde org die nak marah2 agaknye....sbnrnye...aku adalah org yg selalu kna marah dgn teruknye klu dgn coach aku tu...hehehehehe....tpi bagi aku xpe la.....die tu dah ade penyakit tua...hahahahahahaahaha!!!!!!!

i miss someone so much.....really missing that person....hurm....i wonder mcm mane la hari die smlm...ok ke x ok.....xtau la...i hope die akan ok je....miss u so much!!!!

aku happy sgt coz ari ni ari last aku ganti puasa aku!!!! yay!!!!!! pas ni boleh la aku aktif spt biasa...hurm...ape lagi aku nak tulis ek??? xde ape lagi kot...xpe la...pe2 hal t aku update lar....

-xoxo-peace!!!

Monday, July 20, 2009

flavour of life.....

rempah kehidupan...hehehehehe...sometimes sweet sometimes not....

love so sweet if we into it....hehehehehehe....lagu ni makes me realize that love doesn't always make us hurt...its also sweet if we can get it together.....

Love So Sweet - Arashi

ROMAJI

Kagayaita no wa kagami demo taiyou demo nakute kimi da to kizuita toki kara
Ano namida gumu kumo no zutto ue ni wa hohoemu tsuki love story mata hitotsu

Kizu tsuita yume wa kinou no kanata e
Sora ni hibike ai no uta

Omoide zutto zutto wasurenai sora futari ga hanarete ittemo
Konna suki na hito ni deau kisetsu nido to nai
Hikatte motto saikou no lady kitto sotto omoi todoku
Shinjiru koto ga subete love so sweet

Soko kara itsumo mieru yo ni
Kono te wo sora ni muke hirogaru kimi to no omoide
Ano katakuna de ijippari na
Boku wo kaeta kimi no te love story arukidasu

Magari kunetteta futatsu no tabiji wa
Koko de hitotsu niji ni nare

Omoide zutto zutto oikaketa yume futari ga tooku e ittemo
Donna tsurai yoru mo kujikesou na chikai demo
Waratte motto saigo no lady kitto sotto negai todoku
Akenai yoru wa nai yo love so sweet

Tsutae kirenu itoshisa wa
Hana ni natte machi ni futte
Doko ni itemo kimi wo "koko" ni kanjiteru

Omoide zutto zutto wasurenai sora futari ga hanarete ittemo
Konna suki na hito ni deau kisetsu nido to nai
Hikatte motto saikou no lady kitto sotto omoi todoku
Shinjiru koto ga subete
Akenai yoru wa nai yo
Shinjiru koto ga subete love so sweet



ENGLISH



Ever since I realised that what was shining wasn’t the mirror and it wasn’t the sun – it was you
The moon smiling way above the tearful clouds, one more love story

My wounded dreams are yesterday now
Let my love song ring out into the sky

Memory, I’ll never, ever forget this sky, even if we’re apart
There’ll never again be a season when I meet someone I love so much
Shine brighter, my greatest lady, this love is sure to softly reach you
Believing is everything, love so sweet

I hold out my hand to the sky so I can always see it from there
And memories of being with you spread out
I was so obstinate and stubborn
And you changed me, a love story is set in motion

May our two winding roads
Merge together here and become a rainbow

Memory, I’ve been chasing this dream all this time, even if we go far away
No matter how tough the night, even if you're about to give up on your promise
Smile more, my final lady, this love is sure to softly reach you
There’s no night that won’t give way to the dawn, love so sweet

This love I can’t tell you about
Becomes flowers that rain down on the town
No matter where I am, I feel you here

Memory, I’ll never, ever forget this sky, even if we’re apart
There’ll never again be a season when I meet someone I love so much
Shine brighter, my greatest lady, this love is sure to softly reach you
Believing is everything
There’s no night that won’t give way to the dawn
Believing is everything, love so sweet

watashi...omairako to tsukida......means...aku, sgt2 cintakan kamu....

love is sweet....love is beautiful....

Saturday, July 18, 2009

kuroshio....

sedih...aku sgt sedih...

pagi tdi aku ade acara yg sgt aku tunggu....track n field amatur tournament...aku amek acara lompat kijang....hehehhehehe...tpi yg wat aku sedih adalah aku dpt gangsa je....

aku sedih sgt...aku xdpt berikan yg terbaik utk team aku n utk diri aku sendiri....puncanya masa aku panaskan bdn pagi tdi...kaki aku terseliuh...n akibatnya larian aku masa start up x berapa bgus...aku ambil masa utk pecut n aptitude kaki aku xbtul...aku sgt2 tension...aku terpaksa wat 3 kali cubaan n yg aku dpt hanya lah gangsa....sedih sgt....

aku bru nak cipta rekod...coach aku adalah org yg paling bnyk sbarkan aku....die la yg teman aku g empangan n kitorg bercerita bnyk benda...die bagi aku nasihat2 yg sgt2 positif...n sorg lagi...pujuk aku...dlm telefon je...tpi sgt2 memberi aku semangat...my baby d...thanks my coach n my baby d....

next time i will get a gold 4 that...aku kna jga kaki aku elok2...hehehehehehe...coach aku ckp sejak aku training ni die bnyk tgk perubahan dlm diri aku....sume positif smpi kan org sindir pun aku senyum je...hehehehehehe....aku pun bangga jgk kat diri aku...aku berjaya bersabar dlm apa jua perkara....yay!!!

i'm positive with my life now...peduli la ape org ckp...i don't care...dah penat nak jga hati n perasaan org lain..now i'm concentrating on myself now....so lepas ni sape2 yg terasa sorry la ye....hehehehehe...jahat je bunyinye....well...life goes on...

next week aku nak pose lak..so masa ke gym akan berubah...dulu aku benci coach aku...skrg ni aku respect die...sbb die bnyk ajar aku erti hidup n erti tabah....kejayaan yg di tempa adalah berdasarkan setitis air mata dan peluh....itu lah prinsip kejayaan die...n aku pulak..."hard work will definitely being rewarded n the rest is to believe in yourself"...thats my principe utk berjaya....

so here i am....believing in myself that i can do it...better than i have now....

-xoxo-peace....