Recently...

hurm...where should i start? ketika entri ini ditulis ia pada waktu selepas sahur dikala ingatan masih elok walaupun sedikit mamai disebabkan rasa mengantuk....

kebelakangan ini mood dilanda suatu perasaan ingin memberontak dan menari-nari walaupun keinginan tersebut amat payah untuk ditunaikan...tetapi rasa bersyukur tetap ada disebabkan ini adalah fitrah makhluk di bumi ini..

through this weekend...there are 3 people want to make up in line...owh God!! i have to be patient...if i burst out then my promise to stay cool n calm will be broke...nope..i musn't break it in any case...

music mood these past two weeks is funky n RnB...dunno why but lately all the mood of the song are changes..what ever it is..its a good sign...means i still have a rythmn in me...i'm glad i have it..back to where i am now...i'm so glad coz i made it to this day...become an actress in so many shoot n sequence in my life makes me realize how though life is...i'm happy coz i made through it...

my health this weekend is not very good...from last week i keep got sick n my energy become low like a battery..owh God...i need my energy back..how can i prove to all people that i'm fine living my life alone? i need my energy n i need to stay healthy...

be hoping that my healthy will be ok i try to create a new memory of me...wish me luck yeah....i'm so lucky coz i have a chance to live in this precious life...

28/08

all things happen start with this date...28/08/2007....masa tu aku ngah muda seh...hehehehehe...aku jumpe die ni kat uni tmpt aku study...at first kitorg ni knal asyik gaduh jer...tpi..sehari aku xtgk muka die aku dah risau dah...sbb aku xde tmpt nak gaduh...sunyi je klu sehari aku xgaduh ngan die...hehehehehe...

mula tu kitorang kwn je..lama2 tu aku dah rasa lain...it start with a kiss n we seal it until 3 years...tpi skrg kitorg dah break dah...aku tulis entry ni pon coz ari ni adalah anniversary kitorg tu pun if we still together...but now dah xkan..so it will become a memorable date to remember...aku sgt syg kat die ni..xpenah2 aku syg org len mcm aku wat kat die...aku jaga sume keperluan dan kehendak die smpi lah assignment pon aku kna paksa die siapkan....heheheheh...klu x...xrasa la kitorg pegang dip sesame....

tpi tu dulu...now aku dah xde pape ngan die....kwn pon aku xtau la...aku tau die marah n benci sgt kat aku sbb aku yg mintak nak break ni...aku bkn ape..aku tau die xtahan dgn long distance relationship ni...utk memudahkan die..aku mintak break...its not easy for me to said that 'kite break la'....masa aku ckp mcm tu pon aku nangis....aku sebak n sedih sgt....

aku mang xnak die sedih...aku nak die happy always...bile die happy, aku pon happy...n bile die xingat kat aku die akn lebih happy...mcm2 yg kitorg lalui bersama sepanjang tempoh 3 tahun kitorg couple ni...biasa r...gaduh tu mcm dah xde ape je...sbb pas tu aku yg akan mintak maaf kat die...hurm...aku dah terlalu bnyk mengalah n now..i dont want...

biar la die belajar utk lupekan aku...g pun..aku ni bkn lah yg terbaik utk die..dah lah duk jauh, susah nak dtg tgk die...aku sentiasa harapkan yg die akn tersenyum...aku yakin die pasti leh bahagia dgn pilihan die skrg ni...mang lah aku agak terguris bile die ckp yg die dah ade pengganti aku mcm aku rasa aku bru mati, tanah masih merah g die dah cri org ganti tmpt aku dlm hidup die...adehh...pedih seh..tpi nak wat mcm mane..tu hidup die n keputusan die....

awk...sy mintak maaf sgt sepanjang 3 tahun ni klu sy selalu sakitkan hati awk..sy tau sy jahat...selalu wat awk marah n selalu cari gaduh kat awk...sy selalu wat awk nangis...maafkan sy..halalkan segala ape yg terkurg dan terlebih yg awk kasi kat sy..maafkan sy sbb terpaksa wat awk mcm ni...sy syg awk sgt2..cuma satu je harapan sy kat awk...andai ditakdirkan sy pergi menyahut seruan Ilahi..dtglah berziarah ke kubur sy...

p/s....sy syg awk smpi bila2...

NOT MUCH

hurm...actually i dont know what to say here...well...the result for my last post is...don't go...means i xpegi KL. maybe not this time...i will have another chance...

lately i feel empty, lonely, lost n everything...arghhh!!!!!!!! i got to admit i lost my best friend...my love n my everything...its my own fault actually...dunno...

well...even though i feel lost...but i'm happy coz that person finally have the happiness...u will be love n now its dream comes true...

may God always bless u n u will find ur true love n ur true happiness...Amin...

whatever it is u always be the one i love so much n u always in me...

back to KL....

hurm...lately, a lot of things go through my mind...my cousin keep said that i must go back to KL...dunno why but lately i became to think of what he said...back to KL means i have to overcome many things...n recently, i hate to fly...hehehehehe...weird isn't?

well...if i thing in the positive way..many things i can do there but....ah...forget that...so..go or not go? my head spinning like wheel already...hahahahahaha.....

waaa!!!! dunno what i have to choose...hurm...

i will think of it i said to him...but to tell the truth...it never cross my mind to go back there...
its ok...for his sake i wil think of it...well..see you soon my blog...i'll see you with my ANSWER...

healthy...

hurm...still continue with this sickness...arghhh!!!! feel so tense n want to be gone...sakit sgt...

tekak sakit, pale pening jer, dada rasa sesak n kaki lenguh2...aduhh...mcm2 penyakit yg serang dlm satu masa..pening pale di watnye...

hurm..xpe la..ni maybe dugaan...

hurm..rasa sedih sgt coz xdpt panggilan temuduga kat mpsj...jelez ngan kwn sorg tu..tpi xpe lah..maybe bkn rezeki kat sana..think positive!!!(xsuka sakit sbb selalu fikir yg negative jer)

ape2 pun...life must go on!!! yeah!!!

hidup ayashi hidup arashi!!!!

GANBATTE!!!!!

the cause

hurm...sakit yg berpanjangan menjadikan aku sedikit sengsara...heheheheh...bkn sengsara ape...tpi aku xleh berckp sbb aku xde suara..hehehehehe...pedih pon ade tekak ni...

pada masa ini...dikala line tgh laju ni aku melakukan bnyk bende termasuklah nak carikan keje kat umi aku...kebelakangan ni die asyik sakit je...so die decided nak stop drive bas skola n nak masuk nurse balik...my father said ok...kitorg pun suka jgk...so bas ni akan dijual la....mcm itu la kiranya...

berbalik nak carikan mak aku keje...aku lak nak wat bisnes je...berbekalkan bakat yg ade...(ade jgk lah dari xde) aku decide nak tlg abah aku...hurm...mudah2an menjadi lah hendaknye ye...

so sape2 yg nak kahwen tu akan jumpe lah muka aku...(cume aku je yg xkahwen2 g...hehhehehe)....

ah...berbalik pada isu post yg lepas..pasal org nak dtg merisik tu...die hntr lah jgk rombongan die tu..aku dgn berbudi bahasanye ckp kat mak die "makcik...klu sy trime cincin ni maknenye sy terpaksa sbb xnak malukan makcik n pakcik" mak die tanpa bnyk soal trus ckp kat aku "maaf nak, anak makcik tu mang degil..siap die bile makcik balik nti"...seram jgk makcik ni aku tgk...hehehehe..ape2 pon, kwn aku ckp teruk die kna bantai kat mak die...pedulikan lah die...yg penting xde org yg nk kacau hidup aku g....

sesuia dgn status sendiri ni...ape2 yg aku wat pon sendiri termasuk lah tanggung sakit ni...pedih wei tekak ni...hukhukhukhuk!!! eh..dah batuk dah...xpe lah..smpi cni je lah kot....

see u all again...

mata ne....

Tired

lately too many things happen at the same time...in my life in my family n in anything that i involved with....

ntah la...ade yg baik n ade yg buruk...tpi bkn tu yg aku nak citer...about a week ago that i want to share here....

a week ago, ade la sorg mamat ni...die ckp kat kwn aku yg die nak hntr rombongan merisik kat umah aku...aku pon ape g..angin la satu bdn...aku dah ckp kat mamat tu yg aku xnak ade relationship kat sape2 pon...

mlm ni die text aku...die desak gak nak hntr..aku ckp je kat mamat tu...hntr la...tpi jwpn aku x...biar padan ngan muka die...aku dah la ngah bzy..die nak cri pasal jgk kat aku...aku geram sgt..dah la nak kawan ngan aku tpi mcm paksa je...aku pelik la..ade gak mamat mcm ni kat dunia ni...

yg kwn aku pon 'pandai' sgt bagi no aku kat mamat tu..thanks la kwn..aku rasa mcm nak cekik2 je batang leher ko...geram!! dah la kasi x g tau kat aku...hurm....

eh? apesal aku termarah lak kat blog ni?? ishk3...hehehehehe...gurau je la...esk jdi satu keje aku g nak tolak risikan org...adehh...pening r pale...nape la mamat kayu ni xfaham...sengal tol la....

ape2 pon aku nak tido dulu...mudah2an esk aku dpt fikir dgn tenang...(bkn utk terima risikan mamat tu..itu aku tetap xsuka)...

gudnite...oyasuminasai....