Showing posts with label truth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label truth. Show all posts

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Arashi 24/7 under observation


Arashi is chosen as the main personalities for NTV’s annual fundraising telethon, 24Hr TV. At the same time, the members are also busy in other projects like movies and dramas.
Amidst all of this, it seems their management agency is also keeping a very close watch on their talents…
“Matsumoto Jun is good friends with Oguri Shun, who is known for being a playboy. Because of this, the agency have told him to stop interacting with his good friendNinomiya Kazunari is also banned from going to drinking parties with his comedian friends. Ohno was told to be more careful after tabloids found out he was dating AV actresses.”

However, that doesn’t stop the men from selling close to 10 billion yen in merchandises this year. This is why J&A is even more severe towards them. Even though they gave them smart phones as presents, it seems that the agency also uses those smart phones to track their every move using a GPS app. This way, they know where the 5 guys are 24/7. And it seems that the guys know nothing about such a tactic.



With such a popular group, tabloids are keeping close tabs on the guys to see if they’ll slip up, but J&A might’ve gone too far with the GPS tracking.

Source: uso-ippai


p/s....J&A pls give them privacy...they not kids anymore which u can do things like what u did....n they need life too~~~

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Japan faces "apocalyptic" Disaster as Radiation Spills from Stricken Nuclear Plant

JAPAN was last night on the brink of an “apocalyptic” disaster as radiation spewed out from the stricken Fukushima nuclear plant, experts warned.

A deadly atomic cloud is poised to spread death and misery across the country and engineers are locked in a desperate battle to prevent a meltdown of fuel rods at the quake-hit reactors.

Millions of Tokyo residents were living in fear that, with a wind change, the radiation could descend on the city.

As the danger rating at the plant was upgraded from five to six out of seven, Europe’s energy Commissioner Guenther Oettinger said: “There is talk of an apocalypse and I think the word is particularly well chosen.

“Practically everything is out of control. I cannot exclude the worst in the hours and days to come.”

Japan’s Prime Minister Naoto Kan admitted perilous levels of radiation were leaking from the power station.

At one point it soared to 400 times the annual legal limit.

Mr Kan said on TV: “Radiation has spread from the reactors and the reading seems high. There is a very high risk of further radioactive material coming out.

“We would like to ask you to remain indoors, at home or in your offices and avoid going outside.”

Chief Cabinet Secretary Yukio Edano added: “Now we are talking about levels that can damage human health. There is no mistake about that.”

He also said a fourth reactor was on fire at the plant that has been hit by three blasts in four days. One reactor was no longer sealed, sparking fears of further leaks. Two workers were reported missing.

US experts fear the danger level will be upgraded to seven. That has only been used once before, at Chernobyl in 1986.

Nuclear expert John Harris said: “It seems to be getting more serious as days go by.

“The fact we have now had three hydrogen explosions tells me almost certainly that the reactor cores must be quite badly damaged.

“It could have distorted to the point of meltdown, where some of the core drips into the bottom of the reactor. That is serious.” Russia’s nuclear chief said all six reactors could melt unless the rods are cooled soon. Japanese ­authorities were last night planning to spray water from ­helicopters into an overheating nuclear fuel storage pool.

In Tokyo, parts of the city were eerily quiet as fear gripped residents.

The few people who did venture out admitted the nuclear threat terrified them more than ­after-shocks. But there was no sense of panic and the expected mass exodus of Tokyo failed to materialise.

Radiation levels reached 20 times the usual level. There was some relief when winds expected to blow any radioactive cloud towards the capital did not ­materialise. But UN weather experts said they were keeping a close eye on changing patterns. More than 140,000 people living within 19 miles of ­Fukushima were warned to stay indoors. A no-fly zone was in place for a 20-mile radius over the plant. Bosses have ­evacuated 750 staff – leaving just 70 brave workers to tackle the crisis.

The International Atomic Energy Agency insisted radiation levels were falling. But local media claimed they rose too high for Tokyo Electric Power Company staff to stay in control rooms. The workers, all wearing protective gear, were rotated in and out of the danger zone quickly to reduce exposure. Japan’s Nuclear and Industrial Safety Agency said the third explosion may have damaged the reactor’s suppression chamber.

Residents living in Soma – 35 miles away and outside the exclusion zone – said they were terrified. And some believe the government is not being honest about the extent of the danger.

Innkeeper Toshiaki Kiuchi, 63, said: “I don’t think they are telling us the truth. Maybe even they don’t know.” Shinako Tachiya, 70, added: “We are really afraid. You can’t see fallout so we are totally relying on them for our lives.

“I think they are not being open with us. They aren’t telling us anything.”

US authorities said low-level ­radioactivity was detected at the ­Yokosuka military base, 200 miles away.

The Foreign Office advised against all non-essential travel to Japan but said there were no plans to evacuate Brits.

More than 500 bone marrow transplant centres across Europe were on standby to treat possible radiation victims.

SOURCE : http://mirror.co.uk

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

STUPID

stupid is a mean word....i heard somewhere bout this phrase...can't remember where but i did....huh!!! what the fuck that i received early on my day today...someone throw a shit to me...its ok. NEVER MIND.

who ever she/he is may God always bless ur life. U r the best in everything u do...MAY U ALWAYS ON TOP n keep calling others stupid. FINE~~....i'm not throwing a shit on u but pls respect others mind n feeling. not only u have a guts to say what u want to say or do what u want to do...to this anonymous people...i thank u from the bottom of my heart for calling me an idiot this early morning...n thank u too coz give a ver "nice" comment to me...but if u have guts dont put ur name as an anonymous...juz put ur real name there. don't be a coward. thats not manners.

dont juz popup on others place n throw shit like what u do to me. its not nice to anybody. i bet u go to school rite? then learns manners is very important back there...remember that other people usually have their own way to pay back what u did to them same as me. so pls..dont do same thing to other people.

Lastly, thanks for dropping by at my blog n give shit to me early this morning. I always wish u a happy good healthy life.***

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Cinta

sgt hangat topik mlm ni....cinta...nape ek aku pilih topik ni?? sebab cinta la aku berkorban dan sebab mende bodoh ni jgk aku merana...pergh!!!!! ayat xleh makan ni...hhahahahaha............

cinta itu buta...mang btol...cinta itu manis..(masa awal2 je tu)....cinta itu menyakitkan (tunggu la bile si die dah bosan ngadap muka n perangai kite yg sume mang dah xelok pada die)....itu lah cinta...tpi kan...sbb mende2 ni...aku dah xpercya pada cinta....

ramai dah org tnye kat aku...bile nak tamatkan zaman bujang?? xkan la nak amek gmbr pengantin je...aku ni bile lak nak naik pelamin??? hahahahahahaha...bkn aku xkisah tpi mang dah xminat pon...bagi aku...cinta itu menyakitkan...sungguh sakit....

cukup la dgn pengalaman yg aku dpt..sungguh perit dan xleh nak ckp ape la....tpi tu dulu la...skrg ni aku dah free..so, sape2 nak isi borg tu leh la try....aku juz bagi hint 1 jer la...aku xsuka kna tipu..tu pantang sket kat aku...hehehehe...so make sure candidate yg isi borg tu bkn sorg yg penipu ok...heheheheheheh...

gurau je k...aku nak merepek je kat blog ni b4 aku tido...n xlah sape lak yg bodoh miskol aku ni...ingat nama aku ayu ke?? bangang nye manusia...xpe la...x elok marah2 sblm tido...ape2 pon....

oyasuminasai (good nite)

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

so long...

sudah cukup lama aku meninggalkan halaman ini tanpa apa2 perubahan....

bkn disengajakan tetapi aku sedang mencari ilham di kala hati dirundung kesepian dan kesakitan....di kala ini aku sedang membina kembali hati ini yang telah banyak disakiti...

di kala ini aku rasa sudah cukup kuat untuk berhadapan dengan apa sahaja...insyaallah...
aku juga insan yang lemah...mudah kalah dengan perasaan...sgt sensitif...tidak dinafikan...

bnyk perkara yang berlaku sepanjang kesenyapan ku dari dunia blogging ini...ntah la....
semua perkara yang berlaku membuatkan aku sgt lemas untuk berhadapan dengan dunia maya ini...cukup aku terluka sekali kerana jika aku terluka lagi kali ini kemaafan akan sukar untuk diraih dari diri ini....bkn kejam tetapi aku juga ada perasaan...smpi bila maruah diri ini harus dipijak seolah-olah ia tidak berharga....

ah...aku sudah pergi jauh nampaknya....mungkin juga kebelakangan ini aku kerap memikirkan tentang diri ini dan hati ini...jika hati ini seperti kulit sudah terlalu banyak calar dan lukanya....tetapi dengan peredaran masa aku ubati hati ini....

maaf andai diri ini tidak mampu untuk berdiri teguh lagi....

Monday, September 28, 2009

bored...

well....

as we now...life goes on...but we cry...we laugh n we do all at the same time....
time by time passes...n left all the bad memories behind...
as we continue walking....only good memories we bring along...

n...we see each other...from eye to eye n heart to heart....
we love each other so much...

n we made a promise n a vow....
that no matter what we will love each other till the end....

coz whats life without u n i make it through these days is all because of u dear...
sometimes i get mad n sometimes i laugh it but its all becoz....

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH....
IF U READ THIS DEAR....KNOW THAT I LOVE U WITH ALL MY HEART.....

Monday, July 20, 2009

flavour of life.....

rempah kehidupan...hehehehehe...sometimes sweet sometimes not....

love so sweet if we into it....hehehehehehe....lagu ni makes me realize that love doesn't always make us hurt...its also sweet if we can get it together.....

Love So Sweet - Arashi

ROMAJI

Kagayaita no wa kagami demo taiyou demo nakute kimi da to kizuita toki kara
Ano namida gumu kumo no zutto ue ni wa hohoemu tsuki love story mata hitotsu

Kizu tsuita yume wa kinou no kanata e
Sora ni hibike ai no uta

Omoide zutto zutto wasurenai sora futari ga hanarete ittemo
Konna suki na hito ni deau kisetsu nido to nai
Hikatte motto saikou no lady kitto sotto omoi todoku
Shinjiru koto ga subete love so sweet

Soko kara itsumo mieru yo ni
Kono te wo sora ni muke hirogaru kimi to no omoide
Ano katakuna de ijippari na
Boku wo kaeta kimi no te love story arukidasu

Magari kunetteta futatsu no tabiji wa
Koko de hitotsu niji ni nare

Omoide zutto zutto oikaketa yume futari ga tooku e ittemo
Donna tsurai yoru mo kujikesou na chikai demo
Waratte motto saigo no lady kitto sotto negai todoku
Akenai yoru wa nai yo love so sweet

Tsutae kirenu itoshisa wa
Hana ni natte machi ni futte
Doko ni itemo kimi wo "koko" ni kanjiteru

Omoide zutto zutto wasurenai sora futari ga hanarete ittemo
Konna suki na hito ni deau kisetsu nido to nai
Hikatte motto saikou no lady kitto sotto omoi todoku
Shinjiru koto ga subete
Akenai yoru wa nai yo
Shinjiru koto ga subete love so sweet



ENGLISH



Ever since I realised that what was shining wasn’t the mirror and it wasn’t the sun – it was you
The moon smiling way above the tearful clouds, one more love story

My wounded dreams are yesterday now
Let my love song ring out into the sky

Memory, I’ll never, ever forget this sky, even if we’re apart
There’ll never again be a season when I meet someone I love so much
Shine brighter, my greatest lady, this love is sure to softly reach you
Believing is everything, love so sweet

I hold out my hand to the sky so I can always see it from there
And memories of being with you spread out
I was so obstinate and stubborn
And you changed me, a love story is set in motion

May our two winding roads
Merge together here and become a rainbow

Memory, I’ve been chasing this dream all this time, even if we go far away
No matter how tough the night, even if you're about to give up on your promise
Smile more, my final lady, this love is sure to softly reach you
There’s no night that won’t give way to the dawn, love so sweet

This love I can’t tell you about
Becomes flowers that rain down on the town
No matter where I am, I feel you here

Memory, I’ll never, ever forget this sky, even if we’re apart
There’ll never again be a season when I meet someone I love so much
Shine brighter, my greatest lady, this love is sure to softly reach you
Believing is everything
There’s no night that won’t give way to the dawn
Believing is everything, love so sweet

watashi...omairako to tsukida......means...aku, sgt2 cintakan kamu....

love is sweet....love is beautiful....

Friday, June 26, 2009

the awful truth.....

mlm ni...i discover one awful truth...smpi aku sendiri pun susah nak percya...tpi aku cekalkan hati untuk percya....aku baca satu blog ni....dan aku akan ingat smpi bila2 pelakon dlm blog ni...awan..bulan..bintang....kini aku jadi xsuka pada ketiga-tiga ni...aku xtau siapa mereka... tpi apa yg mereka tulis dlm blog ini sgt2 membuatkan maruah ku jatuh...sgt2 membuat aku rasa terhina....sgt2 membuat aku rasa x ingin hidup lagi...tpi aku cekalkan semangat...aku mesti hidup...aku nak dorg tau bahawa aku kuat....

mlm ni...aku rasa sgt bodoh...selepas aku let go everything aku dikejutkan dgn ape yg terjadi...my God!!! smpi bila diri ini harus di tipu begitu???? inilah apa yg aku rasa sebaik aku habis baca blog tersebut....memang la isi nya tidak bnyk tpi cukup membuat aku rasa tidak layak untuk hidup di dunia ini...bkn sbb rasa bersalah...tpi sbb aku rasa malu yg amat sgt...bru jap tdi aku berdoa...Ya Allah...Kau berikan lah pembalasan kepada sesiapa yg telah menganiaya diri ku ini...aku tidak tahan Ya Allah....

aku rasa tidak berhak untuk hidup...tahun lepas, MySpace...kali ni blog...lepas ni?? aku x tau la... dua pelakon dalam satu bdn....aku tidak tahu mahu percya yg mana...tpi aku tetap percya dgn my baby d....who very calm n caring...who i love so much....the rest...i leave it to God....

jika ada sesiapa melihat keadaan ku masa ini...pasti akan berkata aku ni gila...org dah wat mcm tu pun leh tersenyum...leh lagi menulis kat blog...ntah la...aku xrasa satu benda pun skrg...terpulang la pada org yg nak menganiaya hidupku...go on...tpi aku berpegang pada satu je...berdoalah, minta lah pada Allah kerana Allah tidak akan pernah mengecewakan umatNya yg beriman kepadaNya....disebabkan yg satu itu...aku berdoa...meminta agar ditenangkan hatiku...di damaikan jiwaku....dan...aku merasa ketenangan itu kembali....

aku hanya berharap satu je....biarlah aku merasai ketenangan yg abadi ini....moga2 aku kembali kepada Allah dgn bersih dari dosa...jika apa yg berlaku ini adalah sebagai pembersihan dari dosa yg aku lakukan...aku redha...aku bersykur kerana aku mendapat petunjukNya di usia muda ini....tidak lah terlambat bila aku sudah tua nti....Alhamdulillah...

berbalik kepada topik utama tdi....buat bulan, bintang dan awan....aku harap hidup korg akan bahagia....hnya ketahui lah...aku sgt2 berterima kasih di atas budi yg korg taburkan kepada aku....kerana budi korg tu aku berjumpa dgn Pencipta aku....aku sgt2 berharap korg akan menemui kebahagiaan yg hakiki....aku tidak akan berdendam...cuma satu yg aku pinta...pintu taubat sentiasa terbuka untuk umat yg mahu bertaubat....aku bkn alim sgt tpi budi yg korg taburkan kat aku cukup buat aku sedar bkn aku yg berkuasa di bumi Allah ini....

buat d....b percya dgn d...deep down in you theres someone who love me....i love u so much....if u already found who u r...let me know....i just don't want believe in the awful truth.....d...b syg d sgt2...cume jgn wat b mcm ni...u said u lied at MySpace n that blog....i believe it....n i trust u....but pls...klu d rasa d dah x perlukan b lagi...juz let me know...supaya b leh wat persediaan n x mati mcm aqeel...

d...klu esk d call or text tpi b x ingat kat d...d g tau la d sape ye...supaya b tau d sape...d adalah org yg paling b syg....b nak ingat kat d smpi bila2...tpi andainya takdir dah tulis mcm ni...d jgn lupe kat b...juz introduce urself to me again....n i will try to remember u....i love u so much d....b syg d...syg d sgt2....terima kasih sbb selama bbrpa bulan ni d bnyk beri kegembiraan kat b..b dah lupakan all the hard thing that we've been through....b syg d sgt2 tau...b selalu nak ada dlm hidup d...i love u d...i miss u always...b pegi dulu tau...jgn lupe cri b tau....


xoxo-b-

Monday, June 22, 2009

senja kala.....

di waktu senja ini....aku merasakan satu kedamaian yg tidak pernah aku rasai sebelum ini....
selama beberapa hari ini hidupku dalam keadaan yg tidak tentu arah....tetapi pada senja ini aku merasakan satu kedamaian...

ya...mungkin kerana aku telah menadah tangan dan berdoa kepadaNya untuk kedamaian dan ketenangan ini...sblm2 ini aku begitu merindui org itu...tetapi dengan mendekatkan diri kepadaNya aku dpt mengurangkan kerinduan itu....aku bru teringat...tiada siapa yg lebih layak dirindui dan dicintai melainkan junjungan besar Nabi Muhammad s.a.w.....Ya Allah...sungguh ku telah melupai Mu....

kini...setelah ku jumpa jalan hidup ku kembali...aku redha dgn ketentuan Allah terhadapku...dan aku merasakan ketenangan ini setelah ku kembali kepada Penciptaku...syukur Alhamdulillah di atas kurniaan Tuhan ini...

kini...setelah sekian lama..aku akan dpt merasai kebahagiaan ini...tetapi aku pun harus berkorban...pengorbanan di jalan Allah...fisabilillah...segala dugaan akan ku tempuh dengan sabar dan ikhlas serta redha...sesungguhnya..sehebat mana pun kita di dunia ini...sebetul mana pun kita di dunia ini...kita tetap akan menghadapNya suatu hari nti...sujudlah kepadaNya sebelum terlambat..tidak perlu malu untuk sujud kepadaNya kerana Dia menerima hambaNya yang ingin pulang kepangkuan jalan....

tak tahu mcm mana caranya??? itu adalah alasan org yg belum sedar...hendak seribu daya, x hendak seribu dalih...umur bkn makin mengecil jumlahnya tetapi semakin meningkat...pulanglah kepadaNya sesungguhnya kita akan memperolehi kehidupan yang tenang, abadi dan hakiki....

berserah kepadaNya kerana Dia yg menentukan perjalanan hidup hamba-hambaNya di atas muka bumi ini...berdoa kepadaNya kerana hanya Dia yg menjadikan doa kita satu kenyataan...
malu bukanlah satu pilihan...tidak salah untuk mengakui kesalahan kita...

sesungguhnya aku sedar...aku adalah hamba Allah yg hina dan tidak berdaya..semua yg berlaku adalah atas ketentuanNya dan aku hanya boleh meminta daripadaNya...

aku bersyukur kerana aku diberikan kesedaran sebelum terlewat...akhir zaman ini bukan kira tua bru Allah cabut nyawanya...yg muda pun sudah boleh kembali bertemu Allah jika dengan izinNya...sebelum terlambat...aku ingin kembali ke pangkal jalan...aku ingin merasai nikmatnya kemanisan iman....


-hamba Allah yg kerdil lagi hina-

pulih...

setelah beberapa hari mendapatkan sesi kaunseling...aku dapat rasakan yg aku beransur ok...my depression hilang sedikit demi sedikit...cuma doktor hensem itu berpesan..."klu die wat something yg rasa2 menyakitkan hati, tnya dia n minta penjelasan but if dia xnak beri sebarang penjelasan tentang apa yg dia wat tu...menangis krna itu dpt melegakan hati yg parah...."
mcm tu la lebih kurang pesanan dokotor tu...die tau yg aku xdpt nak handle sebarang kesakitan lagi...cukup dgn pengalaman lepas katanya...my mind, my body had enough...jika berlaku sekali lagi..maybe i can't survive...hurm...complicated jgk masalah aku ni....

susah untuk aku nafikan...tpi itulah realitinya...aku berdepan dgn dugaan hidupku yg paling besar...diriku masa lampau dan diriku masa sekarang berebut untuk duduk dan menjadi dominan...aku xtau apa yg aku rasa...aku rasa seperti ingin kalah je...tpi x..aku msti teruskan hidup...memang kesakitan amat pedih...tpi berbaloi kah aku give up hnya kerana dia???
dia hnya insan biasa...cuma..aku menyayanginya..itulah..hebatnya kuasa kasih sayang...
tpi yg aku xfaham...nape die selalu nak aku ikut telunjuknya n wat aku rasa bersalah ngan diri aku ni??? aku sering mengalah dengan diriku dan akhirnya aku menjadi pemberontak....ape2 yg die wat msti aku nak sangkal...aku buntu....aku xfaham ape yg terjadi dgn diriku....

kadang-kadang, aku pelik...nape dugaan aku ni berat sgt??? bru aku faham...semakin berat dugaan Allah keatas hamba-hambaNya..semakin Dia menyayangi hamba-hambaNya...syukur...aku sgt bersyukur...

kepada dia...dear..pls stop this game..i don't know what u up to...but pls..i love u so much...don't tear my heart...i can't handle it if it happen again...this is serious...maybe ur-ex dulu selalu ugut nak mati la ape la klu u left them...but me no...my doctor already examine me...n the reality is in front of me...my brain n my body xkan dpt menampung kekecewaan lagi....if that happen...i'll be gone...this is not a game...thats the secret yg xramai org tau....hurm...dunno la...guess its my destiny....i bkn nak minta simpati kat u...i juz nak tell u my conditions...thats all...i sgt2 u akan faham....don't play a game anymore...i love u


4m the one who really want to live....

Friday, June 19, 2009

hilang...

tiba-tiba aku teringat lagu avril lavigne-when u're gone....

When you're gone
the pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
the face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
the words I need to hear
to always get me through the day
and make it ok
I miss you

aku seperti merasakan benda yg sama....kehilangan adalah lumrah...
kita bersedia dgn tidak...itu lah takdir....

takdir cinta-rossa.....lagu ini sgt pilu dan menyayat hati...masa aku putus dgn dia kali pertama dulu...aku dngr lagu ni...smpi skrg lagu ni masih jdi lagu favorite aku...aku masih ingat lagi antara lirik lagu ni....
andaikan ku bisa lebih adil
pada cinta kau dan dia
aku bukan nabi yang bisa sempurna
ku tak luput dari dosa
biarlah ku hidup seperti ini
takdir cinta harus begini
ada kau dan dia bukan ku yang mau
oh Tuhan tuntunlah hatiku
penguasa alam
tolonglah pegangi aku
biar ku tak jatuh pada sumur dosa
yang terkutuk dan menyesatkan cintaku
itulah antara lirik lagu yg sering wat aku menangis...hurm..smpi skrg kot...aku dah jarang dngr lagu tu...tpi tiap kali aku dngr aku msti menangis...ntah la...sgt2 touching lak lagu tu...
hurm...aku dngr lagu tu sbb mumy bagi kat aku..die kata.."bakhil, cuba qil dngr lagu ni...sedih btl..mumy suka lagu ni walaupun sedih..." mang..aku pon suka lagu ni walaupun sedih
d...aku sgt rindu dia...kebelakangan ni hubungan kami sgt hambar...tiada lagi keceriaan..hanya air mata menjadi peneman ku saban malam...aku rindukannya....dia? aku x tahu...aku harap dia rindukan aku jgk...aku sgt2 menanti kehadirannya dlm hidupku kembali....aku rindu nak dpt text dari die mcm dulu...hurm...tpi die xde cdit...web sms ade..ms pon ade..tpi xpe la...maybe connection die xok...
aku....seperti hari2 yg lain tetap mcm ni...bosan n sume perasaan bercampur-baur...xtau la...
tpi aku tetap bersyukur kerana aku masih lagi bernafas di atas muka bumi Allah ini....aku bersyukur kerana aku tahu mcm mana hendak mengubat hati yg luka berdarah...mengubat hati yg hancur....aku bersyukur kerana aku tahu....
hurm...nak tulis ape lagi?? aku pun dah blurr...next time i wrote again....
with another interesting topic lak k??
see u again...peace...
xoxo

i hate this feeling!!!!

i hate this feeling...rasa tidak berdaya dan putus asa...i feel it these recent days...
ntah la kenapa....
but i want to lose hope n i want to give up....sib baik aku masih ada iman dlm diri...
aku kuatkan hati dan perasaan ku....
air mata menjadi teman yg paling setia....

xtau la kenapa...aku kerap rasa mcm ni...mungkin sbb....aku rasa sgt2 tertekan....
aku bru je balik dari berjumpa doktor...n still...keadaan aku x berubah...
doktor dah xleh nak wat ape dah....teruknye sakit aku....

hurm...aku seperti hilang...aku x leh trus mcm ni...aku kna bangun...ya..aku harus bangun...
tpi...mcm mana???

dia...dia juga seperti ingin menghilangkan dirinya dari ku...entahlah...adakah mungkin disebabkan kesalahan yg telah ku lakukan terhadap dirinya??
oh Tuhan!! tidak!! aku tidak sanggup untuk berdepan dgn ini sekali lagi...tidak!!!! walaupun yg pertama itu aku tidak merasai nya tpi aku tau keadaan nya...sgt sakit dan pilu...

aku..satu jasad tetapi dua perwatakan...kadang2 bila aku hilang kawalan diriku yg lagi satu akan muncul...skrg dia makin kerap muncul....aku tahu kerana aku sering merasai kehadirannya..dia seperti memaksa aku menjadi sebahagiannya...ntah la....

aku dah xtau nak ckp ape lagi...ok la...
aku akan menulis lagi...

amor da vida....xoxo

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

aku yang bersalah....

maafkan aku di atas keterlanjuran perbuatan ku...aku tidak maksudkannya....
aku harap suatu hari nti akan ada kemaafan bagi ku....

sekarang ni aku hidup di atas rasa bersalah....mang perit...aku seperti mahu mengalah...dan tdi aku hampir mengalah...aku tidak sanggup hidup kecewa sebegini....

tpi aku kuatkan tekad...demi dia yg aku sayangi dan aku harap masih menyayangiku...aku kuatkan tekad untuk berubah...menebus segala kesilapanku...

jika itu mampu untuk membuat dia tersenyum dan berkata "i miss u baby b".....

Sunday, June 14, 2009

for my love one.....

Oh Bulan..
Enggan melayan diriku lagi
Pabila airmata membasahi pipi
Dan lagu lagu di radio seolah olah memerli aku
Pabila kau bersama yang lain

Adakah perasaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta
Yang masih bersemadi untukmu
Dan sebenarnya ku mengharapkan di sebalik senyumanmu itu
Kau juga menyintai aku

Ku enggan berpura pura ku bahagia
Ku enggan melihat kau bersama si dia
Oh ku akui cemburu
Mula menular dalam diri
Pabila kau bersama yang lain

Adakah perasaaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta
Yang masih bersemadi untukmu
Dan sebenarya ku mengharapkan
Di sebalik senyuman mu itu
Kau juga merindui aku

Pabila kau merenung matanya
Ku rebah jatuh ke bumi
Di saat kau benar-benar mahu pergi
Seperti ku bernafas dalam air
Adakah perasaaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta

Yang masih.. bersemadi untukmu
Dan sebenarya ku mengharapkan
Di sebalik senyuman mu itu
Kau juga merindui aku
Oh...


Dan Sebenarnya ..
Dan Sebenarnya .. Aku rindu ..
Dan Sebenarnya ..

Dan Sebenarnya .. Aku tak mampu ..
tanpamu..

xoxo-